Child Therapy
Helping your overwhelmed child turn worry, outbursts, impulsivity, into Calm, Confidence, & Independence
Does your child struggle with any of the following?
Avoidance of certain situations
Inattention
Anxiety
Outbursts at school or home
Impulsiveness
Stomach Aches
Difficulty sleeping
Lack of appetite
Bullying
Low Self-esteem
Difficulty with being apart from you
And does your child have any of the following super powers?
Sensitive & Attuned
An old soul
Empathetic
Creative
Humourous
Energetic
Kind & Thoughtful
Spontaneous
Intelligent & Perceptive
Wonderfully curious
Original
No, you’re not a bad parent & your child isn’t a bad kid!
Maybe you second guess your parenting, wondering if you’re too close or too distant with your child, or perhaps you replay earlier life decisions like if only you sleep trained or did “attachment parenting”, or maybe if you didn’t return to paid work as soon from parental leave?
Parenting is tough….incredibly tough! There’s plenty of opportunity to doubt yourself and feel like a failure.
I’m here to tell you you’re not a failure and neither is your child. As a parent of 3, I get it and can assure you that your child isn’t a lost cause. Rather, your child is responding to stress in accordance with their development, personality, and context - they are doing the best they can with the skills they have.
But, you are concerned about your child…
There’s nothing more despairing than reading over the report card, or the psychological assessment to read descriptions like “doesn’t get along well peers,” is “hyperactive”, “aggressive,” “defiant”, “disrespectful,” etc. Your heart sinks.
Know this: Your child isn’t a problem. They are just experiencing a problem! Imagine if your child could be viewed in light of their development, the skills that they need but don’t have just yet, the barriers that make a successful day harder for them, and that the "behaviours” they exhibit aren’t intentional or out of spite, but rather signs of overwhelm, where they’ve soaked up so much and have nowhere to put it?
As a past teacher, parent, soccer coach, and kid at heart, I can tell you that there is great potential for your child to feel at ease again and to enjoy their time at school and at home. And throughout the therapy process, you might feel better as their parent too!
Read on to see if my child therapy services might help your child.
So where might this overwhelm be coming from?
Different brain circuitry (“leaky brakes” which can make impulse control, attention, flexible thinking, emotion regulation more challenging)
Lack of resources & supports
Fast paced lifestyle
Stressors
Unmet Needs
Skill Deficits
Trauma (e.g., abuse, neglect, violence in the home)
Technology & Social Media Use
Temperament
Heredity
Regardless of the cause, your child’s wonderfulness and your love for them is not up for debate!
How we’ll work on it together…
Your child is unique which is why my approach to working with each child is customized to them: to their interests, hobbies, sense of humour, needs, and to their goals for therapy. My approach and goals are also based on your wishes as the parent.
I work to meet children on their terms in ways that help them feel more at ease, empowered, and imaginative. As a child at heart, I delight in connecting with children in playful ways. Typically, this looks like having nature-based sessions at a local conservation area where we explore the various features (river, beach, waterfall, forest, islands, animals, insects), while playing games, talking about what’s on their mind, role playing, practicing new skills, and creating “top secret plans” to experiment with between sessions as per therapy goals. Sessions will always involve your input on concerns, successes, and requests for topics to be explored. You are your child’s best team player and advocate, I want to honour that by having you central to the process and ensuring you’re in the loop with what’s explored and discussed each session. Most of the time, you will be included in some or all of the session. You might hover in the background on a walk, or be joining in with therapy games, or relaxing on a bench in the distance observing your awesome child in action!
We can also have sessions virtually (not to be confused with how remote learning felt over the pandemic!). Instead of having what feels like another zoom meeting, we engage in shared play on either end of the screen (e.g., using Lego, painting, playing games, drawing, using toys and objects from home to enrich sessions), and sometimes even play Roblox together while adapting it to therapy goals.
Supporting Your Child with School Consultation & Advocacy
As a past teacher & parent of school aged children I get how hard school can be for children at times. It can make a world of difference to children’s mental and social health when their school days go well and they have the support they need. When requested, I happily coordinate services, supports, communication, and recommendations with school staff so your child can flourish in the school setting. The more predictability, safety, support, and encouragement your child has, the more they will likely feel confident, at ease, and happy with their time at school.
Wondering if therapy will work for your child?
“I don’t know if my child will open up or feel comfortable meeting with a stranger”
If your child has had a rough go at school, there’s a chance they might be used to being centered out for their “behaviour” by adults. Or maybe you’ve seen how they don’t say a word during their doctor’s appointments. Or perhaps, when you try and have them open up about what’s going on they just say “nothing” or become frustrated and it ends with both of you feeling discouraged.
My goal is to help your child feel safe enough and respected so that they can develop a connection with me and know that I’m on their team. I work to enter into their world and tailer sessions around their interests and wishes. If they play catch we will make time for that in session, if they like to explore nature we will do that, if they like playing games that involve lots of laughter and running we will do that. Talking is just one way of helping your child reach their goals. Each session involves conversations but how they look depends on where your child’s at.
“I don’t know if my child needs therapy.”
Have you ever taken your child to the doctor because of a complaint they had and you weren’t sure about how serious it was? You might have felt silly for taking them in and wondered “am I over reacting?” However, once you got home I bet you either felt reassured (if it wasn’t anything concerning), or grateful to know that the concern was noteworthy and relieved to have a plan in place.
Your child’s mental and emotional health is no different. The seemingly invisible side of emotional, mental, and social pain often invites us to doubt the importance of getting help.
If you choose to have your child connect with me we will take time to hear out your concerns, your child’s concerns, and I will happily give you input on next steps and what could help. Chances are you have sought out help for good reason.
“I worry I’ll be judged as their parent”
Parenting is both incredibly rewarding and challenging. The “parenting industrial complex” is everywhere - books on what you should and shouldn’t do, the advice given on countless websites and social media, and the rumor mill that can plague the communities where we live.
As a parent I know how tough parenting is and how the journey comes with so many opportunities to feel like you’re failing or less than. This is why I have nothing but utmost respect and compassion for you - In how I talk with you, ask you questions, to how I voice my admiration for your initiatives, and assume that you’ll be a cornerstone to the process of supporting your amazing child throughout our work together. While therapy is for your child, I also work hard to help you feel better as their parent too!
Reasons to be Optimistic…
If your child had an 84% chance of feeling better about their life, would you take that chance? Pretty good odds, right?! I have helped 84% of the people I’ve worked with.
And, it’s not a lifetime commitment - Most people average 5-6 sessions with me.
There are no side effects from therapy, and most of the time the benefits last far beyond therapy.
My experience with kids…
Throughout each phase of my life I’ve always been involved with children in some shape or form. While I’ve had many experiences and travels in my life, nothing fills my cup more than connecting with children!
I’ve been a camp counsellor, a music teacher, ski instructor, a teacher at schools for children with behavioural needs in the UK, a high school teacher and supply teacher in Ontario, and am currently coaching two of my daughters’ soccer teams. I’m also a proud father to my 3 active and inquisitive children!
I enjoy being that person in your child’s corner, while collaborating with you both to overcome the problems in their way.
Let’s team up to make things better!
